Rose led us fools on an expedition into the woods of New Jersey (yeah, apparently we have woods) and up Pyramid Mountain. It's up 287 North somewhere. I can't tell you exactly where it is, but it involves circling the town of Boontown at least 16 times. We took so long getting there we had to kill and eat one of the squires just to survive. We finally made it and stopped at the visitor center for a map and also received a tutorial on what the local fauna sound like and what their poop ("scat") looks like. Adam now knows how to say 16 essential phrases in cockatrice. Then we were on our way.
After a brief foray through the trails, we had our first discovery. A naturally occuring soccer field. We claimed it in the name of our Lord. Professor Rodickus Braddio posed before it with one of the native load bearers.
We shant say what was going on in these three pictures.
Here Rose oversees her charges at the first point of interest - a scenic overlook. We met a lizard with a cobalt blue tail and its angry father. We ate our provisions. And there was much rejoicing.
And here's the stuff we scene at the overlook. It really is a nice area - it's hard to believe you are in New Jersey, except that even an hour into the woods you can still hear the traffic and the airplanes and stuff overhead.
And here's the house we'd like to live in one day. Far away from all you people. Oh we didn't mean you!
The second point of interest is called Tripod Rock. It was deposited here during the last Ice Age by a glacier. It's a huge rock balanced on top of three smaller rocks. We, uh, took some pictures of it.
There's also another rock that's clearly the secret door entrance to Death Mountain. Unfortunately we didn't have any bombs.
Aaaand there's these two rocks here called Calendar Rocks. (Seen enough rocks yet?) Rose assures us that if the sun hits these rocks just right, a 1983 My Little Pony calendar will appear on the forest floor.
Adam made a walking stick for Wayne, for next time.
Rod astride the Calendar Rocks, like a Colossus looking for his sister.
This is the bear cave that Rose was too chicken to stand in front of. This was part of Bear Swamp. There was also Big Cat swamp, where there are supposed to be bobcats. We didn't see any bears or bobcats, but we did hear some frogs.
We caught a few fleeting glimpses of the (somewhat) hairless apes that inhabit this region.
Playing under Tripod Rock is probably a bad idea.
The map assured us that you can see Manhattan from the top of Pyramid Mountain. If you squint really hard at this picture you might be able to see it to the left of the powerline. If you squint even harder, you can see a manifestation of the Virgin Mary.
A picture of a reservoir from the top of Pyramid Mountain. The reservoir was created in 1669 as the Dutch limestone mining and fur trapping settlements increased in population and the demand for a steady supply of drinking water grew. And so the reservoir stood for hundreds of years, supporting the surrounding community. Until Adam filled it with every @#$*^!! rock and log he could get his hands on.
As Priscilla parted the trees and looked beyond, she thought of her ancestors, the first white men to travel in these parts, seeing the pristine wilderness, the wild animals, and the powerlines.
Priscilla explores a potential shortcut. A large tree had fallen and was leaning against the side of the mountain. We could have walked up the tree and scaled the face instead of winding around. In these pictures, Priscilla was thousands of feet about the ground and could very easily have fallen to her death. She's just that brave.
No one knows why the chipmunks spared our lives. They had us outnumbered and surrounded. But by the time we had pulled out our camera to record the last few moments before our deaths, they were gone.
Without this sign, we would have crashed into the trees and died. We were just moving that fast.
All in all it was a successfull expedition, thanks to our intrepid guide Rose and the will of the Lord. We lost none of our main party and only a few natives, and we brought back the ancient flowering bloom that could cure Matilda's deadly foot rash. But have we seen the last of Dr. Spectacus? Find out next time when we take... the Red Marker trail.
P.S. For those who can't get enough pictures of trees and rocks, Rod & Priscilla's Indian Lake vacation website amazingly hasn't been shut down yet.
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