SuperMegaMonkey: Ummm... Other?: July 2006 Archives

Ummm... Other?

I don't care how old this is. Call it a classic. Ninjas are sweet!

Facts:
1. Ninjas are mammals.
2. Ninjas fight ALL the time.
3. The purpose of the ninja is to flip out and kill people.
Ninjas can kill anyone they want! Ninjas cut off heads ALL the time and don't even think twice about it. These guys are so crazy and awesome that they flip out ALL the time. I heard that there was this ninja who was eating at a diner. And when some dude dropped a spoon the ninja killed the whole town. My friend Mark said that he saw a ninja totally uppercut some kid just because the kid opened a window.

By min | July 25, 2006, 12:19 PM | Ummm... Other? | Comments (2)| Link

And I Thought You Guys Were Crappy Drivers

This poor kid. But I have to say, I'm totally on board with him never driving - ever. It's bad enough with my dad out there driving with one eye sporting a cataract and the other with double vision (God help us - his eye doctor said it was fine for him to drive).

A 16-year-old boy apparently had a seizure during his driving test, causing him to hit five vehicles, flip his Jeep and wreck the front of a store.

By min | July 20, 2006, 10:48 AM | Ummm... Other? | Comments (4)| Link

Brought To You By The Letter 'R'

Rod sometimes mentions a comic he read where Doctor Octopus stole the Letter H. To illustrate the severity of this, all the Hs in the comic were missing. In the end, Spider-Man stopped him. It would appear that there is one other person in the entire world who has also read that comic.
Link

A consonant-loving thief has police and business owners baffled after dozens of Rs were stolen from signs around the community.
"We've lost our Rs. And we want them back," said Randall Jones, president of Headley Hardware.
...
Putnam Inn manager Jane Hansen isn't sure how the thief climbed more than 6 feet off the ground to take Rs from a sign in front of her motel.

It wouldn't be so hard for a thief with 4 octopus-like robotic arms, now, would it?

By min | July 20, 2006, 10:35 AM | Comics & Ummm... Other? | Comments (19)| Link

Hoppy in Ireland

Oh, sure. Wait til after we leave before something exciting like this happens.

Runaway circus kangaroo on the loose in Ireland
"This kangaroo broke loose just before the show while they were bringing him from the cages to the arena. He decided to take a walk," said local farmer John Walsh on whose land the 2-year-old male, named Sydney, made his break for freedom.
...
"He would be happy out there and he'll have plenty of grass, plenty of water and plenty of sunshine," Walsh told Reuters on Wednesday as Ireland basked in near record temperatures more typical of Sydney's native Australia than Ireland's temperate maritime climate.

I'd also like to point out another example of Global Climate Change there with Ireland having "plenty of sunshine". It's just their luck. The Irish finally get to enjoy some decent weather for a change, except they're all so short on melanin that they'll end up getting skin cancer because of it.

By min | July 20, 2006, 10:17 AM | Ummm... Other? | Link

Sicker Still

There are Christians who can't wait for the end of the world because they think Jesus will come and take them to heaven. They call it the Rapture. They are excited and happy about things like Israel bombing Lebanon because it means the time of the Rapture is approaching. All the lives lost are a good thing, as far as they're concerned. The only thing they're sad about is they didn't convert enough people. It's sick and demented to cheer for the suffering of others because you think some mythical savior is going to come and take you away. Well, guess what? Even if Jesus did come, he wouldn't take you because to have joy over war and death makes you an evil person, and the Christian faith has a completely different place for your kind.

If you can stomach it, here's a message board with some Rapture enthusiasts. If not, here are a few of the posts on the site:

I too am soooo excited!! I get goose bumps, literally, when I watch what's going on in the M.E.!! And Watcherboy, you were so right when saying it was quite a day yesterday, in the world news, and I add in local news here in the Boston area!! Tunnel ceiling collapsed on a car and killed a woman of faith, and we had the most terrifying storms I have ever seen here!! But, yes, Ohappyday, like in your screen name , it is most indeed a time to be happy and excited, right there with ya!!
If He tarries, I will just have time to get my hair and nails done (you know let all I come into contact with know of my Bridegroom and what He has/will do). So i am all spiffied up for Him when He does arrive to take me home. No disappointment, just a few last minute details to take care of to be more pleasing to look at.
Days like today it's all I want. Other days because of others I want one more. But what a privilege to be apart of the rapture. I can hardly wait!!

They're all so excited by the prospect of being taken away from this "harsh" life to some wonderful place that they don't give a damn about how they get there. So what if it takes the deaths of millions to bring it about?

By min | July 14, 2006, 11:36 AM | Ummm... Other? | Comments (1)| Link

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