Issue(s): Uncanny X-Men #183
Cover Date: Jul 84
Title: "He'll never make me cry"
Credits:
Chris Claremont - Writer
John Romita Jr. - Penciler
Dan Green - Inker

Review/plot:
So this is the first issue where we see all of the X-Men home from Secret Wars/Japan and Kitty Pryde and Magik back after the Massachusetts Academy kidnapping. Everyone is pretty calm about it. You'd think if you'd found out that all your young students were kidnapped and enthralled by an evil mutant while you were away, you'd rally the team and go over there and raze the academy to the ground. We do hear in New Mutants #18 that Xavier is in Massachusetts. So maybe he was trying a less direct approach. But you wouldn't think Storm or Wolverine would settle for that, considering their feelings about Kitty.

Speaking of feelings for Kitty, this issue starts off with Colossus breaking up with her. He tells her he met another girl during Secret Wars, fell in love with her, and that she died in his arms.

And that his feelings for Kitty have changed. He no longer loves her. He's direct and honest and trying to be kind. Kitty makes it back to her room before she starts crying.

Wolverine is pretty upset about the break-up. He thinks Colossus is acting ridiculous, and he thinks Colossus' love with Zsaji (who is never named in this issue) wasn't real. He intends to bring Colossus out to a bar in Manhattan and beat the crap out of him. Nightcrawler tags along.

But things work out so Wolverine doesn't have to get his hands dirty. Juggernaut is in the bar, in civilian clothes.

The cover spoils this, so it's not a surprise to the reader. Colossus accidentally dumps his drink on the Juggernaut, and Juggie's not accepting apologies. The two proceed to tear up the bar...

...while Wolverine sits back and watches (and Nightcrawler frets).

Juggernaut wins hands down, and classily drops a wad of cash for damages at the end. What no one knows is that Colossus probably saved the Juggernaut's life, because the lady that was flirting with him at the bar before the fight started turns out to be Selene, who intended to drain his energy (maybe his powers would have protected him; i don't know).

I think she winds up with John Byrne instead.

Rogue is not handling her encounter with Michael Rossi last issue very well.

Everyone loves a Juggernaut brawl. I think the break-up scene was done very well. And Romita Jr.'s art is looking very nice.

Quality Rating: A-

Historical Significance Rating: 3 - Return of Selene. First references to Forge. Juggernaut will use the "civilian clothes" trick, on purpose this time, years later against the Hulk.

Chronological Placement Considerations: Xavier is said to be "off with the New Mutants" for the weekend. This must be an untold story. Valerie Cooper and Mystique are shown in the car on their way to visit Forge this issue. Next issue they arrive. Unless there was a lot of traffic on the way, next issue needs to take place pretty soon after this one. I'd place it directly after, but Rachel Summers needs to appear in the New Mutants #18-20 arc before she appears in Uncanny X-Men #184. Finally, we need to push all of the X-Men and New Mutants books back in publishing time to get Warlock's arrival on Earth prior to Marvel Team-Up annual #7 due to some Spider-Man dependencies. By publication date, the Juggernaut was last seen getting buried in concrete in Amazing Spider-Man #230. He subsequently appeared in a pair of continuity inserts that took place around the time of Secret Wars - Code of Honor #3 and Marvel 1985. The Code of Honor issue took place during Secret Wars, so Spider-Man and the X-Men wouldn't have been aware that he was on the loose again (assuming they missed the news reports when they got back). Marvel 1985 took place afterwards but the Juggernaut didn't actually cross paths with either Spidey or the X-Men in that story.

References:

• While Valerie Cooper and Mystique (in her Raven Darkholme persona) are driving from the Dallas airport to meet Forge, they discuss Senator Kelly's Mutant Affairs Bill, introduced in Uncanny X-Men #181.
  
• Juggernaut starts ranting about the fact that Spider-Man dropped him in a block of concrete in Amazing Spider-Man #230.
  
• Wolverine refers to the time when Kitty agreed to marry Caliban to save Colossus' life. The footnote is to Uncanny X-Men #179, which is actually when Caliban released her from her vow. She made the vow in Uncanny X-Men #169-170. I think this part of Wolverine's argument is weak. First, and most importantly, if Colossus doesn't love Kitty any more, he shouldn't stay with her out of some weird sense of duty. That's just going to make everyone miserable. Second, Kitty made the vow to Caliban to save all of the X-Men, not just Colossus. So you date her, Wolverine.

Crossover: N/A

Continuity Insert? N

My Reprint: X-Men Classic #87

continuing to support my theory "villians win more often when out of costume."

Claremont stated that Black Tom would return in this title or New Mutants in 1984.

I hadn't put two and two together, namely dat dis was the return of the Juggernaut since the infamous Spidey brawl. Funny how Romita drew both fights. It would've been nice to see how Juggy escaped dat cement. Unfortunately we'd have to wait over a quarter of a century for Uncle Rog to return to clear up dat story.

I think she winds up with John Byrne instead.

Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!!!!!

Amusing Cracked.com article about this issue:

http://www.cracked.com/blog/why-greatest-x-men-comic-about-drunken-brawl/

I think there's something in ASM in the 660s, maybe just before Lizard becomes Shed, where Juggernaut's going up against Spidey and Capt. Universe, and he recounts the terrible ordeal it was getting out of the cement...

Also it appears that the other X-men did not share Shooter's discomfort about the relationship.